But Why Not?

Apparently there is a lot my daughter doesn't understand. Like the fact that markers will not magically start to taste like Skittles if you just suck on them long enough.

Also, we are at that lovely stage of toddler-hood where every single thing Mommy says is instantly questioned. She must think I have the mental capacity of a piece of cheese. She does the whole interrogation thing in kind of a...weird way, though

Nora: Mommy, is it Monday or Fruesday or Fliday or Sannurday today?

Me: It's Tuesday.

Nora: But why NOT? Why NOT, MOMMY?

Me: Uh, why not what? You asked what day it was. I told you.

Nora: WHY NOOTTTTTTT???????

Me: I DIDN'T DENY YOU ANYTHING!!!

Nora: Can we go to Chloe's house sometime?

Me: Sure.

Nora: But why can we go to Chloe's house sometime?

Me: Because you asked.

Nora: But why did I ask to go to Chloe's house?

Me: Because she's your friend. And her mom always has wine.

Nora: Why NOT???

Me: Why not what?????

Nora: But why is it why not?

Me: Are you really honestly trying to make me bang my head against the window?

Nora: But why do you bang your head against the window?

Me: Nora. Have you finished this round of torture?

Nora: NOTHING!!!!! I'M NOT GOOD RIGHT NOW!!!

So I've decided that when my kids ask me something I don't understand I'm not going to ask them "what?" anymore. They repeat themselves about 249 times regardless. I should save that energy for taking another bite of my cookie.

She also does not understand portion control. The thing still eats like an elephant. It's not an uncommon occurrence for me to go into the kitchen and find her teetering on one of the top shelves of the pantry rooting around diligently for more food even though she's already got 17 Snack Sticks sticking out of her mouth and four packs of fruit snacks stored in her diaper. I fully expect one day to find her fashioning herself some kind of satchel to sling over her shoulder for more functional storage. What's really fun is when she climbs the fridge. Ever stroll into your kitchen to see your daughter literally standing in the fruit drawer with her head so far in the cheese drawer you can't even see it? She must think she gets bonus points everytime she spills the entire jug of apple juice all over the floor. Because that happens every 20 minutes.

I can in fact hear rustling and chewing coming from the kitchen as I type this. She must have found the 5 lb chicken I have in the fridge. Or perhaps she was in the mood for a nice stuffed pork chop. I should go see if she's started on that satchel yet.